Patriots unite for USB
We have a need that far exceeds our thirst for oil or them once-in-a-while cocaine binges, but rather a need for a wireless hardware standard that's as fast as USB Hi Speed.

Wireless USB logo

What if ya wanna download yer digital photos of yer friends an' relatives falling to their death from a burning tower, but ya lost yer cable? What then?

Wireless USB fights terrorism
Well y'all had better get one of them there new Wireless USB gadgets, that's what. How else we gonna fight them terrorists, huh?

Thanks to a worldwide alliance of free market enterprise, we got them new Wireless USB gadgets transferrin' data darn near 480 megabits per second.

Fast, easy, universal
Hell, I don't have none of them statistics, but I betcha that's even faster than you can say "fuck" to Tony Blair on live T.V.!

An' Wireless USB is easier to use than them patriot missiles. Ain't never had a USB device accidentally blowing no British helicopters out of the sky, that's fer dang sure, I reckon.

So y'all have a good one, America. Bottoms up!